Sunday, August 29, 2004

Vote For ‘None of the Above’

The latest controversy over John Kerry’s Vietnam War record is another perfect example of why so many Americans are disenfranchised with the political process. That’s not to say that I’m blaming the Republicans, as Democrats are just as guilty. But this election (as I’m sure is as has been the case in most presidential elections) is less about issues and more about manipulating public perception.

With that in mind, El Duderino dedicates this column to the reasons for its support of John Kerry, or in this case, its non-support of the current administration. Ideally, Monty Brewster would enter the race, as he did in the 1985 Richard Prior film Brewster’s Millions, and dedicate his millions to the purpose of getting none of the candidates elected.

The GOP often times likes to refer to itself in business terms. That government should be run more like a business. Results are what matters. If that was the case, the Board of Directors would have no choice but to fire George Bush as shareholder value has been abysmal. And that’s with the GOP controlling every major facet of government.

Economy
According to a recent report published by the Census Bureau, from 2001 through 2003, poverty increased, income stagnated and the ranks of the uninsured grew. Despite bringing the Nation to war, the Bush administration handed out more than $400 billion in tax cuts, which primarily benefited those in higher income brackets. As evidenced by a Congressional Budget Office report, the middle class has taken over a larger role of our Nation’s tax burden as a result of those same tax cuts. In June, the Nation experienced its largest trade deficit ever at just under $56 billion.

Despite the record stimulus added to the economy by the administration’s tax cuts, job growth has been weak at best, not even adding enough jobs to cover increases in the population, and there are a few million jobs less in the Nation today than when Bush took office in 2001. Worse, the budget deficit is expected to reach an all-time high of $445 billion this year and keep rising to a high of an estimated nearly $2 trillion in the not-too-distant future. This hamstrings future administration’s ability to deal with any unforeseen disasters, be it another major terrorist attack, an international incident that is truly time sensitive or another recession.

We’re not even close to being in a better spot than we were when Bush entered office.

International Arrogance and Ignorance
The United States used to be an example to the rest of the world. We came to the rescue of our European and Asian allies in World Wars I and II. We were largely responsible for ending the Cold War. We’re far and away the largest benefactor to Developing and Third World nations. Our political pressure helped end Apartheid, end decades worth of corruption at the hands of the PRI in Mexico and helped instill Democratic ideals (often times bringing down ruthless dictatorships and despotic regimes) in dozens of countries world wide… all through peaceful actions.

The Bush administration has single-handedly taken that century’s worth of good will and completely and irreversibly made Americans the scourge of the world for the foreseeable future. Although it would be nice to be thought of as good people, what’s worse is the potential damage that anti-American sentiments may spawn.

Our economy is based on the world becoming increasingly advanced and opening up new markets for the goods our companies sell. With the increasing coordination of the countries in the European Union and the sheer mass of more than one billion inhabitants in both China and India, we’re not going to be the 500 pound capitalist and technologically advanced gorilla forever. The more we piss off the rest of the world, the less likely those same countries are going to be in welcoming our economic policies in the future.

And what’s even more disheartening to ED, is that the Bush administration’s arrogance in dealing with our allies has seemed to wear off on the rest of society. Anecdotal evidence suggests that we’re entering a new era of religious ferocity, the evangelical Christians versus Islam, with history telling us that such religious fanaticism leads to violence and division.

Environment
ED is not an environmentalist. If it’s a choice between logging a plot of land owned by a private company (and employing a town) versus moving a species of owl to another forest, ED is for moving the owl. But, ED is also a believer in moderation and cooperating with the rest of the world. The current administration’s failure to enact policy (or even show any interest) in reducing our dependence on oil and other non-renewable sources of energy is appalling.

Bush policies that can be deemed “anti-environment” and show a lack of respect for the views of the rest of the industrialized world include cutting the EPA budget, proposing oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, as well as drilling in vast plots of land in the Rockies, burying the Kyoto global warming treaty (of which America is by far the largest producer of greenhouse gases), renouncing his pledge to cap carbon dioxide emissions and suspending new limits on arsenic in drinking water. More good news came this past Tuesday, the EPA reported that fish in virtually all of the nation’s lakes and rivers are contaminated with mercury.

Education
The No Child Left Behind Act (NCLB) was the Administration’s first major piece of legislation. As can be said about several of the President’s major initiatives, NCLB appears to be more about being able to point to progress in a key voter segment, education in this case, versus actually attempting to reform a neglected aspect of society.

In the case of NCLB, the Administration pushed forward legislation, which on the surface made a lot of sense, creating accountability for educators. Unfortunately, the Administration provided very little funding for the Act, nor did it provide a reliable game plan for reaching the goals put forth in the legislation.

Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Brewster’s Millions
Character: Monty Brewster
Setting: At the behest of a will, Monty is tasked with spending $30 million without acquiring any assets in return. After being largely unsuccessful, Monty decides to take his millions and run for the Mayor of New York due to the corruption that has enveloped the city. Because winning the election would result in him attaining a salary and thus an asset, Brewster runs on the platform of vote for none of the above, in order to ensure he doesn't win the election.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: ED isn’t crazy about John Kerry, neither his policy (most notably his seeming aversion to free trade principles) nor his personality. But, the current administration has been given four years and has failed miserably. If voting for none of the above was an option, that box would have at least one checkmark.

Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Friday, August 13, 2004

… and that's the fact that a bunch of slave-owning, aristocratic, white males didn't want to pay their taxes

A study being released today by the Congressional Budget Office (CBO) details the impact of the Bush tax cuts that occurred in 2001. Result? Look for another terror alert coming soon.

The study found that the wealthiest 20 percent of our country saw their share of federal taxes drop from 64.4 percent of total tax payments in 2001 to 63.5 percent this year. The middle class saw its burden of the tax load INCREASE. Although Democrats have continually stated this to be the case, the administration has done a masterful job of denying the left’s claims.

It’ll clearly be much tougher for the administration to de-bunk the CBO, though. The CBO is headed by a former senior economist from the Bush White House, Douglas Holtz-Eakin, and is headed by a Republican Congressman. Expect the spinning from the White House to be mind-boggling. They’ll be bringing out the big guns on this one.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A61178-2004Aug12.html

Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Dazed and Confused
Character: Ms. Ginny Stroud
Setting: It’s 1976. The bell rings for the final class on the last day of school. Students are jumping from their seats, rushing for the door. As a final piece of wisdom, hippie teacher Ms Ginny Stroud leaves her small town Texas students with words of wisdom that I’m sure impacted each of them profoundly… “Okay guys, one more thing, this summer when you're being inundated with all this American bicentennial Fourth Of July brouhaha, don't forget what you're celebrating, and that's the fact that a bunch of slave-owning, aristocratic, white males didn't want to pay their taxes.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Minus the slave-owning part, the people that Ms. Ginny Stroud decries are those that have benefited the most from the administration’s tax cuts.


Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

My Motto is “Do it my way or watch your butt”

An interesting Slate article yesterday by Daniel Gross noted the parallels between Costco and Wal-Mart in contrast with the Democratic and Republican parties. As simply a demographic comparison, Costco tends to be in so-called blue states/areas, while Wal-Mart tends to be centered in the red states/areas.

While the article only makes a cursory mention of the ideology that drives management decisions at Costco and Wal-Mart, the two companies do sum up the two political parties quite effectively. A summary of Wal-Mart is a microcosm of everything that ED doesn’t like about the current state of the GOP.

Wal-Mart is overtly aggressive and will do about anything to ensure that it’s the clear alpha male in its industry (and the world for that matter). The AVERAGE wage at Wal-Mart is less than Costco’s LOWEST wage. The company is oft-criticized by labor groups for failing to provide adequate healthcare and benefits, for discriminating against women, for locking cleaning personnel in the stores at night to reduce the need for security personnel and forcing overtime without additional pay.

Aside from its shoddy labor practices, the company routinely forces its way into communities despite widespread protest. In a recent highly publicized attempted store opening in Inglewood in Southern California, Wal-Mart essentially tried to incorporate its own city so that the company could skirt environmental laws. A Wal-Mart sponsored ballot initiative was rejected by the voters of Inglewood. The company also has utilized its standing as the world’s largest company to force its own agenda. The company rejects music CDs and movies that it finds objectionable and forces suppliers of nearly every consumable good and/or product on the planet to conform to its standards.

But, at the end of the day, Wal-Mart is a wildly successful entity and has lined the pockets of tens of thousands of investors. The company from any monetary measurement is one of the most glaring and shining examples of American capitalism. And that all about sums up the Bush administration doesn’t it… as long as money is being made, everything is fine, despite the consequences of that growth (sadly, it’s tough to make an argument that the economy is in a wildly successful state, but that’s a different column).

Of course any card carrying Republican will counter that America can’t have it both ways. Although some get left behind in the Bush vision of America, the greater good is fed by enacting policy that places economic growth as trumping secondary issues such as the environment or workers rights.

Luckily for the rest of us, Costco shines as the beacon of hope on the hill. Pay STARTS at $10 an hour. Workers receive tremendous health benefits and are generally treated like they matter. As Slate notes, the results are that “Costco’s turnover is a third of the retail industry average of 64 percent and shrinkage – the amount of inventory lost to theft – is about 13 percent of the industry norm.” Although Costco might not be the biggest or the most profitable, the company has been outperforming Wal-Mart in many categories as of late and more importantly it’s creating an ecosystem of happiness for those whose lives the company employs. Isn’t that the indicator that should really matter?

http://slate.com/id/2104988/

Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Raising Arizona
Character: Nathan Arizona Sr.
Setting: H.I. and Ed have stolen one of the famous Arizona quintuplets, as “biology and other peoples' opinions conspired to keep us childless.” While being interviewed by the police, who suspect a disgruntled employee may have stolen Nathan Jr., Nathan Sr, owner of the Unpainted Arizona chain of furniture stores, explains his management style by stating, “Hell, they're all disgruntled. I aint running no damn daisy farm. My motto is ‘Do it my way or watch your butt!’"
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Nathan Sr.’s management style is an example of a red state business owner. That was a joke. Don't get all riled up, red state people.

Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

Lester Bangs

Welcome to Lester Bangs, a new and recurring column that details what tunes have broken into the rotation at El Duderino radio. Music reviews aren’t ED’s specialty, so all content has been lifted from other sites, as noted. If one person finds enjoyment from a new band as a result of Lester Bangs then all the time and effort will have been worth it.

America Loves You

MODEST MOUSE (Good News For People Who Love Bad News)
“Half expansive, burnished radio-rock, half swampy Delta hoodoo-hollerin' that reeks of Brock's Southern sojourn.” Spin, May 2004

“Never happily slotting into any template demanded back in their home town, MM are nearer to some wondrous mish-mash of Pavement and Beck; closer in harmony to The Flaming Lips.” Logo

SONIC YOUTH (Sonic Nurse)
“Every song but one falls fully developed in the five- to seven-minute ballpark, brimming with enough dissonant wizardry, smart vocal imagery, and tonal shades of rock to fly the freak flag like no aging rockers ever have.” Austin Chronicle

“All told, this album is probably the band's best balance of pop melodies and avant-leaning structures since Washing Machine; even if it doesn't rank among their most ambitious work, Sonic Nurse sounds like the kind of album Sonic Youth should be making at this point in their career.” All Music Guide

STELLASTARR* (Stellastarr*)
“The New-York four piece makes its full-length debut with this 10-track effort that has drawn comparisons to the usual suspects (Joy Division, The Cure, The Pixies, et al) as well as to newer bands who also draw from the same sources (Interpol, Hot Hot Heat, et al).” Metacritic

“I know the whole ‘retro-rock’ thing is en vogue in about a bazillion different ways, but Stellastarr*’s take just seems a bit more energetic and vibrant than most. Considering the genre, this disc is a frighteningly solid listen.” Delusions of Adequacy

THE BUZZCOCKS (Operators Manual – Best of…)
“Did The Buzzcocks invent pop-punk? Probably not. Did they perfect it? You bet. Marrying glorious pop melodies, the chainsaw roar of a downstroked guitar, and the furious angst of a million confused teenagers, The Buzzcocks played punk rock that was physical, passionate, and emotionally compelling, but also joyously listenable (and danceable) in a way The Damned and The Clash could never dream of being. If the Buzzcocks Mk. 1 (1976-1981) ever made a bad record, they've done a splendid job of keeping it a secret; all three of the group's original albums are brilliant, and Singles Going Steady (which collects the A and B sides of their first eight 45's) is as perfect a compilation album as you're ever likely to encounter.” MusicMatch

Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Thursday, August 05, 2004

Random Thought of the Week

ED is curious... have the sales of digital video recorders, such as Tivo, gone through the roof during the political season as annoying spots dominate the eight minutes of commercials we receive during a standard 30 minute show? Have sales taken off particularly in the so-called battleground states?

This may be ED's chance to break a national story...

Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

It's Not a Lie. It's a Gift For Fiction.

Much has been made of the Michael Moore movie Fahrenheit 9/11. Despite being decidedly anti-Bush, this movie has bothered me since it started to be heavily promoted by the media prior to its opening night. I’ve held off writing because I couldn’t really figure out why I was finding myself so anti-Michael Moore. I’ve seen several of his movies and generally found them to be effective, if obviously a bit slanted, in raising real questions and concerns that needed to be addressed by the larger public. Nothing wrong with creating dialogue even if it’s dialogue that I personally didn’t agree with.

But the time has come to end the silence. After much thinking and speaking with a number of friends from opposite ends of the political spectrum, I’ve come to two primary conclusions as to why this movie bothers me. El Duderino speaks:

First and foremost, Fahrenheit 9/11 is based on false logic. Michael Moore is the master of using satire, sarcasm and surprise to manipulate the viewer into believing positions that he presents as fact. He takes shots that by themselves would be completely innocuous, adds music and his own dialogue and suddenly transforms his target into a bumbling idiot. Scenes that come to mind from 9/11 that fit this bill include the showing of President Bush golfing and Moore surprising a Congressman on the street and pushing him on his willingness to send his own children to Iraq. Surely we as a nation don’t really have a problem with Bush golfing, and just because a Congressman doesn’t want to send his child into war, that doesn’t prove the war is wrong.

Unfortunately, the examples noted above, trademarks of Moore’s films, are the least offensive results of this movie. In this latest effort, Moore clearly had a point he wanted to prove and formed the facts the way he wanted to bolster his case.

Up until recently I had only read articles countering Moore’s claims within the film from journalists that clearly had a personal vendetta against the filmmaker. Recently ED was introduced (thanks Hartman’s My Pulpit blog) to a Newsweek article that demonstrates the factual errors in a clear and concise fashion without attacking Michael Moore. I’ve included the link to the article below, but essentially what the article states is that the central themes of the movie, that President Bush has compromised his duties as the leader of our country because of his loyalties to Middle Eastern interests (and money), are completely without merit. Moore’s actions more than push the ethical envelope of being a responsible documentarian, which is particularly disappointing on such a highly volatile topic.

In addition to many of his arguments being without merit, I also find this movie annoying because instead of acting as a unifying factor for a nation, liberals have taken their standard holier-than-thou approach and effectively further polarized the voting public. The movie hasn’t bolstered the anti-Bush cause, it’s just made the left and right more perturbed with each other. We should be striving for open communication and a willingness to agree to disagree with each other. This movie takes the opposite view of teaching us as a society to belittle those with opposing views to our own. Thanks Mr. Moore.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5335853/site/newsweek/

Headline Quote Movie of Origin: State & Main
Character: Walt Price
Setting: In a conversation with screenwriter Joseph Turner White (played by the brilliant Philip Seymour Hoffman) regarding the need for script changes, director Walt Price (played by the equally brilliant Bill Macy) provides White with information that’s not quite true. White responds saying to Price, “that’s a lie.” Price responds with, “it’s not a lie. It’s a gift for fiction.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Michael Moore likely feels the same way as Walt Price… that his movie isn’t a lie. It’s a gift for fiction. After all, it is just a movie and Moore presents himself as a satirist. Unfortunately, the repercussions from Moore’s “gift for fiction” are a polarized, embittered nation.

Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.

Monday, August 02, 2004

Nobody’s Looking for a Puppeteer in Today’s Wintry Economic Climate

If I hear one more Bruce Ratner (new owner of the New Jersey Nets) is cheap because he didn’t resign Kenyon Martin comment, I’m going Robert Deniro in Taxi Driver.

New Jersey did indeed reach the NBA Finals in consecutive years with the trio of Kidd, Martin and Jefferson. But, the Eastern Conference was extraordinarily weak during those two years (the Celtics made the conference finals one of those years for christ’ sake!), they got blown out by the West representative both years and, more telling, last season, the Nets were clearly several notches below the Pistons and Pacers. Being significantly over the salary cap for the foreseeable future, mediocrity was the Nets future without big changes.

The situation is quite similar to that faced by the Seattle Sonics management after the 96/97 season. The team had reached the finals in ’96 but faced increased pressure in a tough Western division, losing out in the semi-finals to the eventual NBA champion Houston Rockets. Although the core of Gary Payton and Shawn Kemp would likely guarantee the Sonics a playoff team for many years, the Sonics decided to trade Kemp for Vin Baker, a move that netted the team 61 wins, although an eventual playoff loss to the The Diesel led Lakers.

Ultimately, the Sonics trade was doomed by the alcohol consumption of Vin “and Tonic” Baker, but the team had little choice, similar to the Nets. Rod Thorn and Bruce Ratner should be commended for the gutsy, unpopular moves they’ve made to give the Nets a shot at a championship long-term. The team netted three first round picks, two of which have the potential to be high lottery picks, while creating salary cap flexibility down the road. If Thorn can figure out a way to rid the team of the cancerous Jason Kidd, which will likely result in an additional round of hemming and hawing, the Nets will have a bright future upon their move to Brooklyn in a few years.

Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Being John Malkovich
Character: Craig Schwartz
Setting: After facing a beat down at the hands of an audience member due to a sexually explicit puppeteering street show, Craig shares his lack of faith in his professional aspirations with his wife, Lotte.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Craig Schwartz had a vision and passion for what he wanted to be and attain with his life… to become the world’s greatest puppeteer. Although he often faces abuses and violence for his life’s ambition, he perseveres. After commandeering the mind of John Malkovich, he determines a plan for fulfilling his goal by utilizing the Malkovich brand. Likewise, Ratner and Thorn may not be taking the easy path, but they’ve got a vision and are confident in the final outcome.


Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.