Doesn’t it feel great to spend money? In the midst of a relationship difficulty or after a bad day at work or just to escape a boring, lonely Sunday afternoon, there aren’t too many better prescriptions. It feels good, even if you don’t actually have the money to pay for that new pair of shoes or designer jeans or even a new car.
But often times the next day when you wake up, or when you receive your credit card statement, the guilt sets in… “What was I thinking!” Credit card debt has oft-times been cited as a likely future black hole for the economy as that debt will have to be paid at some point in time.
The Republican-led House and Senate have just encountered such a moment of fiduciary irresponsibility. In a time of record deficits, that are only to grow larger as we fight a war on terror as well as a war on tyranny, our Republican controlled Congress has just announced that they will announce tax cuts that will cost $146 billion to the treasury. What will plug the enormous gap that’ll be left by the tax cuts? Who the hell knows. Congress has no provisions to offset the tax cuts.
Unfortunately, a cure for a lonely Sunday isn’t the reason for the Republican hand-outs. Chalk this one up to election year politics. This almost makes me want to see Bush win the election so he can go through four years of having to figure out a way to deal with all of the enormous problems that he’s created in his four years in office.
The results from a poll recently conducted stated that only 9 percent of respondents would like a Bush second-term to be like the first, while 31 percent said they’d like minor modifications. A whopping 58 percent stated that they’d want major changes. Youch.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Character: Jeff Spicoli
Setting: It’s the first day of school. Mr. Hand is providing a lecture on the do’s and don’ts of his class. A few minutes into his speech, he notices a knocking on his door and proceeds to let the tardy student, Jeff Spicoli, into the class. Mr. Hand asks Spicoli what he’s doing at which point Spicoli tells Mr. Hand that according to his schedule he’s supposed to be in Mr. Hand’s class… “This is U.S. history. I can see the globe right there.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: It’s not really relevant, I just needed a break from having the quote match the actual post. But, in a stretch move, the quote is in regards to a U.S. history class. As Ali G was told by a guest, history is happening all the time, and the deficit spending currently occurring will certainly be a noted historical event in the future.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Thursday, September 23, 2004
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Quote of the Week
"Those who seek to bestow legitimacy must themselves embody it, and those who invoke international law must themselves submit to it."
- Kofi Annan, head of the United Nations, in a not-so-veiled shot at president George Bush during his speech at the United Nations.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
- Kofi Annan, head of the United Nations, in a not-so-veiled shot at president George Bush during his speech at the United Nations.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Like House of Pain Was Gonna Do Anything About It
Lost in all of the attention on Iraq, is the unraveling of political stability in Afghanistan, the place that no one denies was an actual hotbed of terrorist activity. While Iraqi elections are still more than three months off, Afghanistan is slated to hold elections for national office in just three weeks.
Unfortunately, the country is in a state of chaos. In just the past week, both the current president and vice-president, who were both appointed members of office and not elected by the general population, have had near misses with a rocket (the president) and a roadside bomb (the vice president). The beheadings that have become a somewhat common occurrence in Iraq have also increased in Afghanistan, adding to security fears. As a result, European nations have now refused to send election monitors, citing a lack of security.
As the Wall Street Journal reports, the problems are similar to those seen in Iraq… a lack of troops. “In Northern Afghanistan, 320 soldiers patrol a territory 1.5 times the size of Bosnia.” Previous news reports suggest that a vast majority of the country is still being controlled by “warlords” and that production of opium continues to increase.
As is the case in many impoverished American neighborhoods, the drug trade provides an economic option that may not be available otherwise, which increases those regions economic dependence upon the warlords. As a stable government would generally be bad for the drug trade, there’s little motivation for the general populace to support stability. Of course, if the Nato- and American-led forces would’ve had a clearer set of priorities and more resources, the warlords would not have had the opportunity to revitalize opium production post the initial invasion of Afghanistan.
This is yet another example of a failed effort by the current administration. When invading Iraq was still in the stages of debate, many officials and pundits noted that the invasion would appear to deflect American’s attention on Afghanistan. That’s exactly what has happened. Now we’re failing miserably on both fronts.
As the topper, in GW’s speech to the United Nations on Tuesday, he re-iterated that Iraq has been a success and that the spread of democracy is the key to ensuring world peace. I wish I lived in his fantasy world. It seems like a nice place.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Swingers
Character: Trent, aka Double-Down
Setting: Upon exiting a Hollywood lounge, Sue is shoulder-bumped by a late 90s Vanilla Ice look-alike. After a brief exchange of hostilities, Sue brandishes a handgun and sends the group of ruffians scurrying. Mikey counters with the line, “Haven’t you seen Boyz N The Hood? Now one of us is going to get shot,” to which Sue replies, “I had to save our rep, bro.” That in turn led to the headline quote, “Like fuckin' House of Pain was gonna do anything about it? He's right, Sue. You don't need to carry a gat.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Bush administration is akin to Sue in this scene and House of Pain is representative of the peoples of this world that don’t share in the same ideals as Bush. GW believes that if we pull a “gat” on them and force them to accept our ideals, our rep will be saved and the American people will be safe and happy. BUT, as John Singleton demonstrated in his movie Boyz N The Hood, the more likely response is a further escalation of violence.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Unfortunately, the country is in a state of chaos. In just the past week, both the current president and vice-president, who were both appointed members of office and not elected by the general population, have had near misses with a rocket (the president) and a roadside bomb (the vice president). The beheadings that have become a somewhat common occurrence in Iraq have also increased in Afghanistan, adding to security fears. As a result, European nations have now refused to send election monitors, citing a lack of security.
As the Wall Street Journal reports, the problems are similar to those seen in Iraq… a lack of troops. “In Northern Afghanistan, 320 soldiers patrol a territory 1.5 times the size of Bosnia.” Previous news reports suggest that a vast majority of the country is still being controlled by “warlords” and that production of opium continues to increase.
As is the case in many impoverished American neighborhoods, the drug trade provides an economic option that may not be available otherwise, which increases those regions economic dependence upon the warlords. As a stable government would generally be bad for the drug trade, there’s little motivation for the general populace to support stability. Of course, if the Nato- and American-led forces would’ve had a clearer set of priorities and more resources, the warlords would not have had the opportunity to revitalize opium production post the initial invasion of Afghanistan.
This is yet another example of a failed effort by the current administration. When invading Iraq was still in the stages of debate, many officials and pundits noted that the invasion would appear to deflect American’s attention on Afghanistan. That’s exactly what has happened. Now we’re failing miserably on both fronts.
As the topper, in GW’s speech to the United Nations on Tuesday, he re-iterated that Iraq has been a success and that the spread of democracy is the key to ensuring world peace. I wish I lived in his fantasy world. It seems like a nice place.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Swingers
Character: Trent, aka Double-Down
Setting: Upon exiting a Hollywood lounge, Sue is shoulder-bumped by a late 90s Vanilla Ice look-alike. After a brief exchange of hostilities, Sue brandishes a handgun and sends the group of ruffians scurrying. Mikey counters with the line, “Haven’t you seen Boyz N The Hood? Now one of us is going to get shot,” to which Sue replies, “I had to save our rep, bro.” That in turn led to the headline quote, “Like fuckin' House of Pain was gonna do anything about it? He's right, Sue. You don't need to carry a gat.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Bush administration is akin to Sue in this scene and House of Pain is representative of the peoples of this world that don’t share in the same ideals as Bush. GW believes that if we pull a “gat” on them and force them to accept our ideals, our rep will be saved and the American people will be safe and happy. BUT, as John Singleton demonstrated in his movie Boyz N The Hood, the more likely response is a further escalation of violence.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
I Hate Her Just Like I Hate That German Chancellor with the Moustache
Under five years of rule by President Vladimir Putin, Russia has been slowly creeping away from the democratic ideals that were expected to be embraced with the fall of the Cold War. The government has been suspected of rigging elections, dominating the media and covertly taking down those individuals it felt threatened by, most notably Russian oil mogul Mikhail Khodorkovsky, who was imprisoned last year, and Forbes Moscow Bureau Chief Paul Klebnikov, who was murdered earlier this year.
Today, Putin took his boldest action yet, announcing widespread changes to election procedures that will effectively end any opposition to Putin’s ruling party – essentially removing democracy from Russian politics. Putin is using the recent terrorist atrocities in Russia as the reasoning for the changes, but clearly this consolidation of power has been occurring for a number of years and will only add fuel to the fire of the Chechens, and other nationalist states within Russia, who were opposed to the already stringent policies of the Putin regime.
It’ll be interesting to how the Bush administration (or the future Kerry administration) reacts to the latest move made by Putin. Bush has taken little action in the past four years against Russia despite loads of evidence suggesting the country was moving away from a democratic state. As the Bush administration has made fighting tyranny basically a central tenet of his administration, what will the future hold in dealing with Russia?
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Curse of the Jade Scorpion
Character: C.W. Briggs
Setting: Woody Allen’s The Curse of the Jade Scorpion details an aging insurance investigator in the 1940s whose struggling to cope with the modernization occurring within his place of employment. The company has enlisted the services of a quality assurance expert, who happens to be female, that is streamlining the organization. His inability to cope with the new procedures forces him into heated exchanges with his female superior and led to the comparison of Hitler, “I hate her just like I hate that German chancellor with the moustache.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: It’s a quote referring to what amounted to Hitler’s dictatorship, which is the direction being pursued by the Putin regime in Russia.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Today, Putin took his boldest action yet, announcing widespread changes to election procedures that will effectively end any opposition to Putin’s ruling party – essentially removing democracy from Russian politics. Putin is using the recent terrorist atrocities in Russia as the reasoning for the changes, but clearly this consolidation of power has been occurring for a number of years and will only add fuel to the fire of the Chechens, and other nationalist states within Russia, who were opposed to the already stringent policies of the Putin regime.
It’ll be interesting to how the Bush administration (or the future Kerry administration) reacts to the latest move made by Putin. Bush has taken little action in the past four years against Russia despite loads of evidence suggesting the country was moving away from a democratic state. As the Bush administration has made fighting tyranny basically a central tenet of his administration, what will the future hold in dealing with Russia?
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Curse of the Jade Scorpion
Character: C.W. Briggs
Setting: Woody Allen’s The Curse of the Jade Scorpion details an aging insurance investigator in the 1940s whose struggling to cope with the modernization occurring within his place of employment. The company has enlisted the services of a quality assurance expert, who happens to be female, that is streamlining the organization. His inability to cope with the new procedures forces him into heated exchanges with his female superior and led to the comparison of Hitler, “I hate her just like I hate that German chancellor with the moustache.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: It’s a quote referring to what amounted to Hitler’s dictatorship, which is the direction being pursued by the Putin regime in Russia.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Friday, September 10, 2004
I Raised You To Be a Winner, So, Dammit Boy, Win
Fantasy drafts have been completed, Madden football is flying off the shelves and the brats and burgers are being thrown onto the grill in parking lots nationwide. Football is in the air.
In the third annual Thursday kick-off game for the country’s best professional sports league, the NFL demonstrated its savvy by pitting a rematch of last season’s AFC championship game… Pats v. Colts.
The game did not disappoint. A back-and-forth affair with the defending Super Bowl champs continuing their parity-busting 16 game win streak. But, most entertaining to ED was the conclusion, with all-world (and all-unlikable) Peyton “of the Louisiana Mannings” Manning driving the high-octane Colts down the field for a potential game-tying field goal.
On a third and relatively short, with time winding down in the fourth quarter, from the Pats 18-yard line, Manning trotted toward the line, and as is the case 99.9999 percent of the time, he saw something he DID NOT LIKE. Time for an audible. Manning barked instruction to the left for his lineman and receivers. Then a similar round of instructions to those lined up on the right. Finally, Manning turned to his backfield mate, Edgerrin James, and instructed James to move from Manning’s right to his left, supposedly to pick up a blitz that Manning had the vision and foresight to sense.
Finally, Manning gets the hike and drops back to pass. James moves forward on the left to pick up the supposed blitz that Manning had predicted. To the dismay of ALL, the blitz did not come from the left, but instead from the right, where Willie McGinest, he of pro bowl fame and noted Colts-crushing plays in the past, raced from the edge. Manning, for some reason unbeknownst to man, decided to escape the rush by moving further back from the line of scrimmage.
Predicatably, McGinest throws Manning down for a 13 yard loss, moving the Colts from a potential 35-yard game-tying field goal attempt to a 48-yard attempt. Colts miss, Pats win. Manning looks like a doosh bag for audibling himself into a sack and then taking his team out of field goal range. Life is good and the world is happy.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Varsity Blues
Character: Sam Moxon, father of Mox
Setting: In a heart-warming exchange, Sam Moxon, former Texas high school football player, gives a pep talk to his second string QB son whose headed to an Ivy League school on academic scholarship. Father Moxon teaches his son a valuable life lesson with the words, “I Raised You To Be a Winner, So, Dammit Boy, Win.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Manning family is as synonymous with football as is Texas with high school football. Archie Manning no doubt taught his sons, similar to Sam Moxon, that it’s a team game and that personal glory and riches are just an added bonus to those who fully immerse themselves in the pursuit of winning and the love of the game. The unselfishness exhibited by young Eli during the draft and by old Peyton when graciously accepting the Colts millions this offseason are indicative of the Manning family crede and focus on the pursuit of the ultimate goal, a Super Bowl ring.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
In the third annual Thursday kick-off game for the country’s best professional sports league, the NFL demonstrated its savvy by pitting a rematch of last season’s AFC championship game… Pats v. Colts.
The game did not disappoint. A back-and-forth affair with the defending Super Bowl champs continuing their parity-busting 16 game win streak. But, most entertaining to ED was the conclusion, with all-world (and all-unlikable) Peyton “of the Louisiana Mannings” Manning driving the high-octane Colts down the field for a potential game-tying field goal.
On a third and relatively short, with time winding down in the fourth quarter, from the Pats 18-yard line, Manning trotted toward the line, and as is the case 99.9999 percent of the time, he saw something he DID NOT LIKE. Time for an audible. Manning barked instruction to the left for his lineman and receivers. Then a similar round of instructions to those lined up on the right. Finally, Manning turned to his backfield mate, Edgerrin James, and instructed James to move from Manning’s right to his left, supposedly to pick up a blitz that Manning had the vision and foresight to sense.
Finally, Manning gets the hike and drops back to pass. James moves forward on the left to pick up the supposed blitz that Manning had predicted. To the dismay of ALL, the blitz did not come from the left, but instead from the right, where Willie McGinest, he of pro bowl fame and noted Colts-crushing plays in the past, raced from the edge. Manning, for some reason unbeknownst to man, decided to escape the rush by moving further back from the line of scrimmage.
Predicatably, McGinest throws Manning down for a 13 yard loss, moving the Colts from a potential 35-yard game-tying field goal attempt to a 48-yard attempt. Colts miss, Pats win. Manning looks like a doosh bag for audibling himself into a sack and then taking his team out of field goal range. Life is good and the world is happy.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Varsity Blues
Character: Sam Moxon, father of Mox
Setting: In a heart-warming exchange, Sam Moxon, former Texas high school football player, gives a pep talk to his second string QB son whose headed to an Ivy League school on academic scholarship. Father Moxon teaches his son a valuable life lesson with the words, “I Raised You To Be a Winner, So, Dammit Boy, Win.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Manning family is as synonymous with football as is Texas with high school football. Archie Manning no doubt taught his sons, similar to Sam Moxon, that it’s a team game and that personal glory and riches are just an added bonus to those who fully immerse themselves in the pursuit of winning and the love of the game. The unselfishness exhibited by young Eli during the draft and by old Peyton when graciously accepting the Colts millions this offseason are indicative of the Manning family crede and focus on the pursuit of the ultimate goal, a Super Bowl ring.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.
Why does no one ever comment on the impact that campaigning for elections has on the responsibilities of those individuals involved? Kerry, including the primary season, has been campaigning non-stop for more than a year. President Bush has now been campaigning solidly, including often times hitting multiple states in a single day, for four or five months. Isn’t the job of United States Senator and President a full-time affair? In addition to changes that need to occur to the McCain-Feingold campaign finance “reform” legislation, does it make sense to enact measures that create campaigning periods?
While both candidates are forced to spend all their time campaigning, the administration is allowing the election to affect its decision-making process.
The Wall Street Journal reported on Thursday that officials have conceded privately that the election is affecting decisions related to stabilizing Iraqi cities currently being controlled by rebel forces. The Journal says the decision is “deeply unpopular among many military commanders” due to the need to stabilize these cities well before the national elections that are scheduled for January. Obviously such a move will likely result in some of the most intense battles to date, which would undoubtedly have a negative impact on the current administration’s forthcoming election.
Another domestic policy issue that wreaks of election year politics is the soon-to-expire 10 year-old-ban on most assault weapons. According to polls, more than two-thirds of the public supports the banning of assault weapons and since the legislation was enacted federal statistics demonstrate that crimes that can be traced to assault weapons have declined by two-thirds. The administration has said that it supports renewing the law but hasn’t made any efforts to push Congress to action.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Character: Ferris Bueller
Setting: Ferris imparting his words of wisdom and his life’s philosophy.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Ferris is indicative of an individual who shirks his real-life responsibilities (school) to focus on his own personal gain, in this case the instant gratification that results from truancy and a trip to the city. Similarly, the candidates in a presidential election shirk their job responsibilities for the pursuit of prestige and power that results from heading the world’s foremost superpower. It’s, like, the same thing.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
While both candidates are forced to spend all their time campaigning, the administration is allowing the election to affect its decision-making process.
The Wall Street Journal reported on Thursday that officials have conceded privately that the election is affecting decisions related to stabilizing Iraqi cities currently being controlled by rebel forces. The Journal says the decision is “deeply unpopular among many military commanders” due to the need to stabilize these cities well before the national elections that are scheduled for January. Obviously such a move will likely result in some of the most intense battles to date, which would undoubtedly have a negative impact on the current administration’s forthcoming election.
Another domestic policy issue that wreaks of election year politics is the soon-to-expire 10 year-old-ban on most assault weapons. According to polls, more than two-thirds of the public supports the banning of assault weapons and since the legislation was enacted federal statistics demonstrate that crimes that can be traced to assault weapons have declined by two-thirds. The administration has said that it supports renewing the law but hasn’t made any efforts to push Congress to action.
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Character: Ferris Bueller
Setting: Ferris imparting his words of wisdom and his life’s philosophy.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: Ferris is indicative of an individual who shirks his real-life responsibilities (school) to focus on his own personal gain, in this case the instant gratification that results from truancy and a trip to the city. Similarly, the candidates in a presidential election shirk their job responsibilities for the pursuit of prestige and power that results from heading the world’s foremost superpower. It’s, like, the same thing.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
If You Want Me to Take a Dump in a Box and Mark It Guaranteed. I can. I Have Spare Time.
Among the previous half-truths previously noted by this column, one glaring omission has been the attacks on Kerry’s liberal record and specifically his views on taxation. In many ways I think his past voting record is somewhat insignificant, at least in regards to topics in which he’s laid out a clear plan.
Elected officials are supposed to represent their constituents. Kerry is from a state that possesses ideals that are more “liberal” than those of the nation as a whole. Clearly he would be expected to have a voting record that mirrors those views. Now that’s he on a national stage, in which the general populace doesn’t support the level of social programs supported in the Northeast, Kerry has stated that he will NOT raise taxes on the middle or lower classes, but that he WILL repeal the tax cuts Bush provided to those in upper income brackets. Case closed. That’s his policy.
Once again, by continually using vague terms such as “most liberal Senator,” the administration continues to show that it doesn’t want to have a debate or dialogue on Kerry’s current policy.
But, for the sake of argument, let’s dissect the attacks on Kerry’s voting record on taxes in contrast with the claims being made by the administration.
In an official Bush-Cheney television ad titled “taxing our economy” the administration claims that Kerry had 98 votes “for tax increases,” which was nearly a 300 percent decrease from its earlier statement that Kerry voted 350 times for “higher taxes”. According to the non-partisan Annenberg Institute (through its FactCheck.org Web site), 43 of the votes in question would not have raised taxes. In a 20-year Senate career, which has included more than 6,000 votes, that doesn’t seem like such a large number.
The general theme of the ad is that Kerry won’t really follow-through on his word to lower middle class taxes (that he’ll pull a George H.W. Bush, if you will), citing his record of voting for gas taxes, lack of support for child tax credits and a 1996 budget that included higher taxes, which Kerry supported. As seems to be the case, the charges are HUGE stretches.
In regards to gas taxes, the ad claims Kerry voted 10 times to raise gas taxes against the middle class and that Kerry supported a 50 cent a gallon tax increase. Both claims are false. The ad claims that Kerry voted 18 times for higher taxes on middle class parents, all in reference to granting child tax credits. In fact, the votes weren’t to raise taxes, as the ad states, but were against lowering the taxes and were all part of larger Republican tax packages.
And finally, the ad mentions the fiscal ’96 budget in which Kerry supported increases in the budget via several specific tax increases. Unfortunately, the majority of the examples cited in the ad would have actually raised taxes against those making over $140,000 per year, which are exactly the type of taxes that Kerry is more than happy to suggest he supports.
http://factcheck.org/article.aspx?docID=247
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Tommy Boy
Character: Tommy Boy
Setting: Tommy Boy, after several failures in his attempt at salesmanship, finds his groove and is in the process of selling thousands of Calloway “the god damn Rolls Royce of brake pads, that’s what they are” brake pads to a regional Midwestern auto parts store. Central to his persuasive argument is the role of the word “guarantee” on the box, of which the term is not present on Calloway products.
Ted, the potential purchaser, states that a guarantee makes a man feel good and asks why anyone would put a guarantee on a box if not for a superior product. Tommy, in a display of wisdom that can only have been learned in his seven years in college, counters that… “The point is, how do you know the Guarantee Fairy isn't a crazy glue sniffer? ‘Building model airplanes’ says the little fairy, but we're not buying it. Next thing you know, there's money missing off the dresser and your daughter's knocked up, I seen it a hundred times.”
Then, referring to the competition’s motives behind the guarantee… “Because they know all they solda ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is. Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for right now, for your sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality item from me.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Republican National Convention is analogous to the competition (such as Zalinsky the Auto Parts King). The current administration is making a whole lot of guarantees about lots of issues because they know in reality, if they’re not guaranteeing future actions, than all they’re selling is a box full of excrement.
It’s Herbie Hancock. Duh.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Elected officials are supposed to represent their constituents. Kerry is from a state that possesses ideals that are more “liberal” than those of the nation as a whole. Clearly he would be expected to have a voting record that mirrors those views. Now that’s he on a national stage, in which the general populace doesn’t support the level of social programs supported in the Northeast, Kerry has stated that he will NOT raise taxes on the middle or lower classes, but that he WILL repeal the tax cuts Bush provided to those in upper income brackets. Case closed. That’s his policy.
Once again, by continually using vague terms such as “most liberal Senator,” the administration continues to show that it doesn’t want to have a debate or dialogue on Kerry’s current policy.
But, for the sake of argument, let’s dissect the attacks on Kerry’s voting record on taxes in contrast with the claims being made by the administration.
In an official Bush-Cheney television ad titled “taxing our economy” the administration claims that Kerry had 98 votes “for tax increases,” which was nearly a 300 percent decrease from its earlier statement that Kerry voted 350 times for “higher taxes”. According to the non-partisan Annenberg Institute (through its FactCheck.org Web site), 43 of the votes in question would not have raised taxes. In a 20-year Senate career, which has included more than 6,000 votes, that doesn’t seem like such a large number.
The general theme of the ad is that Kerry won’t really follow-through on his word to lower middle class taxes (that he’ll pull a George H.W. Bush, if you will), citing his record of voting for gas taxes, lack of support for child tax credits and a 1996 budget that included higher taxes, which Kerry supported. As seems to be the case, the charges are HUGE stretches.
In regards to gas taxes, the ad claims Kerry voted 10 times to raise gas taxes against the middle class and that Kerry supported a 50 cent a gallon tax increase. Both claims are false. The ad claims that Kerry voted 18 times for higher taxes on middle class parents, all in reference to granting child tax credits. In fact, the votes weren’t to raise taxes, as the ad states, but were against lowering the taxes and were all part of larger Republican tax packages.
And finally, the ad mentions the fiscal ’96 budget in which Kerry supported increases in the budget via several specific tax increases. Unfortunately, the majority of the examples cited in the ad would have actually raised taxes against those making over $140,000 per year, which are exactly the type of taxes that Kerry is more than happy to suggest he supports.
http://factcheck.org/article.aspx?docID=247
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Tommy Boy
Character: Tommy Boy
Setting: Tommy Boy, after several failures in his attempt at salesmanship, finds his groove and is in the process of selling thousands of Calloway “the god damn Rolls Royce of brake pads, that’s what they are” brake pads to a regional Midwestern auto parts store. Central to his persuasive argument is the role of the word “guarantee” on the box, of which the term is not present on Calloway products.
Ted, the potential purchaser, states that a guarantee makes a man feel good and asks why anyone would put a guarantee on a box if not for a superior product. Tommy, in a display of wisdom that can only have been learned in his seven years in college, counters that… “The point is, how do you know the Guarantee Fairy isn't a crazy glue sniffer? ‘Building model airplanes’ says the little fairy, but we're not buying it. Next thing you know, there's money missing off the dresser and your daughter's knocked up, I seen it a hundred times.”
Then, referring to the competition’s motives behind the guarantee… “Because they know all they solda ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is. Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for right now, for your sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality item from me.”
The quote is relevant to this story how?: The Republican National Convention is analogous to the competition (such as Zalinsky the Auto Parts King). The current administration is making a whole lot of guarantees about lots of issues because they know in reality, if they’re not guaranteeing future actions, than all they’re selling is a box full of excrement.
It’s Herbie Hancock. Duh.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Monday, September 06, 2004
Dad, you're like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny combined... you're just as charming, and just as fake
The Republican Party has clearly mastered the art of tugging at human emotion. Version 2004 of the Republican convention was a textbook case of energizing its voting base, ultimately leading to a huge swing of the pendulum in favor of the current administration.
Because the goal of an election is to win, in some ways the GOP performance at the convention is admirable, but mostly it further illustrates that politics is more marketing than substance or the aim to elect the individual that best serves the desires of the public as a whole.
There were dozens of examples in which speakers at the convention made claims that either don’t support Bush policy (such as an endless stream of moderate Republican speakers to divert the public from the president’s actual views) or that attacked Kerry using logic that can be deemed twisted and even outright deceitful.
The following was my favorite:
Over the past several months, and several times within the convention, Republicans have stated that John Kerry is weak on national security because he’s repeatedly voted in the past to kill funding for weapons systems, such as the M-1 tank, the Apache helicopter and several versions of the F-series jet fighter, among others.
This is just a completely non-sensical claim, especially when considering the fact that our current vice president, Dick Cheney, was the secretary of defense at the time of the vote by Kerry, occurring shortly after the fall of the Eastern bloc. Here’s what Secretary Cheney said at that time:
“Overall, since I've been Secretary, we will have taken the five-year defense program down by well over $300 billion. That's the peace dividend. … And now we're adding to that another $50 billion … of so-called peace dividend.
Congress has let me cancel a few programs. But you've (referring to the Democrats) squabbled and sometimes bickered and horse-traded and ended up forcing me to spend money on weapons that don't fill a vital need in these times of tight budgets and new requirements. … You've directed me to buy more M1s, F14s, and F16s—all great systems … but we have enough of them.”
Can you believe, first, that the Republicans have the kahunas to say Kerry was interested in dismantling the defense budget when Cheney and the first Bush administration wanted deeper cuts, but even worse, is that they’re getting away with it! I find particularly funny how he refers to the cuts as the “peace dividend”. I should point out that ED isn’t disagreeing with the cuts. It was clearly the prudent thing to do at the time. My issue is with the administration criticizing Kerry for when they were the party pushing forward the cuts.
http://slate.com/id/2106119/
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Big Fish
Character: Will Bloom
Setting: Upon returning home to spend time with his dying father, Will Bloom is interested in finding out the truth of his father’s life. Upon confronting his father, and being denied the answers he was seeking, Will tells his father that he’s like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny combined, just as charming, and just as fake.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: President Bush is charming. He comes across as much more sincere than Kerry, and despite coming from a privileged background, he’s able to connect on a personal level with many. Unfortunately, his election is based on words that make people feel good, like “resolute” and “will”, and not on results or on his own policy. If it were based on results, you would’ve heard terms like Afghanistan, Iraq, economy, education and healthcare, all the major policy areas that have resulted from the administration but barely got mentions at the convention.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
Because the goal of an election is to win, in some ways the GOP performance at the convention is admirable, but mostly it further illustrates that politics is more marketing than substance or the aim to elect the individual that best serves the desires of the public as a whole.
There were dozens of examples in which speakers at the convention made claims that either don’t support Bush policy (such as an endless stream of moderate Republican speakers to divert the public from the president’s actual views) or that attacked Kerry using logic that can be deemed twisted and even outright deceitful.
The following was my favorite:
Over the past several months, and several times within the convention, Republicans have stated that John Kerry is weak on national security because he’s repeatedly voted in the past to kill funding for weapons systems, such as the M-1 tank, the Apache helicopter and several versions of the F-series jet fighter, among others.
This is just a completely non-sensical claim, especially when considering the fact that our current vice president, Dick Cheney, was the secretary of defense at the time of the vote by Kerry, occurring shortly after the fall of the Eastern bloc. Here’s what Secretary Cheney said at that time:
“Overall, since I've been Secretary, we will have taken the five-year defense program down by well over $300 billion. That's the peace dividend. … And now we're adding to that another $50 billion … of so-called peace dividend.
Congress has let me cancel a few programs. But you've (referring to the Democrats) squabbled and sometimes bickered and horse-traded and ended up forcing me to spend money on weapons that don't fill a vital need in these times of tight budgets and new requirements. … You've directed me to buy more M1s, F14s, and F16s—all great systems … but we have enough of them.”
Can you believe, first, that the Republicans have the kahunas to say Kerry was interested in dismantling the defense budget when Cheney and the first Bush administration wanted deeper cuts, but even worse, is that they’re getting away with it! I find particularly funny how he refers to the cuts as the “peace dividend”. I should point out that ED isn’t disagreeing with the cuts. It was clearly the prudent thing to do at the time. My issue is with the administration criticizing Kerry for when they were the party pushing forward the cuts.
http://slate.com/id/2106119/
Headline Quote Movie of Origin: Big Fish
Character: Will Bloom
Setting: Upon returning home to spend time with his dying father, Will Bloom is interested in finding out the truth of his father’s life. Upon confronting his father, and being denied the answers he was seeking, Will tells his father that he’s like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny combined, just as charming, and just as fake.
The quote is relevant to this story how?: President Bush is charming. He comes across as much more sincere than Kerry, and despite coming from a privileged background, he’s able to connect on a personal level with many. Unfortunately, his election is based on words that make people feel good, like “resolute” and “will”, and not on results or on his own policy. If it were based on results, you would’ve heard terms like Afghanistan, Iraq, economy, education and healthcare, all the major policy areas that have resulted from the administration but barely got mentions at the convention.
Contact El Duderino at jaipf@hotmail.com.
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